Why must I feel like complete shit. Why must I get yelled at for every single action of mine. I swear, if all I'm going to be hearing is arguing and bullshit, then please just chop off my ears right now. I can be a musician and be deaf, I don't care. I'm just sick and tired of crap. And to make matters worse, my damn guitar head snapped in half from my neck. My Epiphone Dot Studio too. I love that thing, yet the things I love seem to just anger me these days. Doesn't that suck? Hell, even making music is angering me. I tried to come up with a chord progression for a song and I got pissed off. For no reason too. I just don't want to be doing any work. I want a week off. I just want to be free. I feel so trapped and confined in my own little prison. How do I break free? The key is gone and it pisses me off trying to find it. Knowing my luck, it's around here somewhere but I'm too oblivious and stupid to see it. Yep, I'm obviously a retard. Everyone can agree with me on that one, right? No? Oh well, I agree with myself. Selfish much? Maybe I am then. So if that's the case, why would anyone want to associate theirself with me? If you're gonna bitch and complain about how selfish I am, then don't be around me. It's that simple. Do I do it on purpose? Not really. I just know that I must look out for myself first, then others. Perhaps this is a philosophy that is uncommon to you all. Well, deal with it. This is me and you can accept me for who I am or leave me. The choice is yours, not mine. All I know is that I'm struggling here to find myself and free this chaos within my tortured soul. I clearly said this before, but I need to do this on my own. With no help from anyone. Because only I can free myself. So, here's to finding the solution to my problem before it's too late.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
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2 comments:
November is just around the corner and then you'll have your winter break! Your guitar will get fixed in no time and everything will be alright again. You aren't a retard Gary. Things will get better eventually. Maybe you're just over-thinking your problems. Answers will come. Just relax and act calm about the things that happen to you and you'll be fine. With or without me, you're still a great person and whatever choice you make, I'll respect whether it's being your friend or something more. You can do this and if you need anything I'm just a phone call away. Just don't worry and relax a little. Love your life and if stress decides to take a visit, go on a walk or listen to music or call a friend to take your mind off it. There's a solution to every problem and I'm sure that you'll find yours soon.
<3
Please remember what I said to you. Don't get so caught up in yourself that you forget the people who love you. They care too. Don't ignore them.
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