Stress

Why am I so stressed out? I really need to calm down. My thoughts are going at about a million miles an hour. I'm doing everything in a speed that is extremely uncontrollable. Hell, I'm even typing fast right now. I should probably slow down otherwise I'll never be calm. But how can I? My keyboarding midterm is tomorrow! This is my last level of keyboarding and I have to pass if I don't want to repeat the class again/fall behind. Same goes for sight-singing III. I'm going to do what I should've done a while ago and that is write my schedule down on a piece of paper. I figured this should help me stick to the plan and make adjustments accordingly if needed.

At any rate, I really don't feel too highly of myself. No, this isn't me asking you for pity. This isn't me asking you to tell me if I'm a good person or not. This is just me feeling like complete shit about myself. I personally don't believe that I'm a great person, and I've got proof. Hell, I've even stated before that if I met me, I wouldn't be friends with me. Seriously, I can't find any good traits about me other than I actually care about others' feelings compared to most men. I'm not a good lover though. I'm not good enough for anyone, that's for sure. Changes definitely need to be made. I really need a big makeover because this Gary isn't working for me. Maybe you all can agree with me here. I don't want people to lie to me about this subject. Perhaps I really am an annoying idiot who just talks and talks and doesn't shut the fuck up. *sigh* I'm just unsure as to what the future holds for me. I've always said only you can determine your future. Well if I keep going like this, my future is going to do nothing but stress me out and hold me back. Fuck, I'm on a train bound for hell. I need to stop this. Lord, please help me. I'm crying out for help, please answer my call...